Roommate blues haiku

Dear Haikusue:

My roommate has recently read a few books by, and become obsessed with all things Michael Pollan. We live in a 3 bedroom flat in the Mission, and she is hell-bent on turning it into a country farm house.  From planting tomatoes, herbs, and a variety of other veggies on the  back stairs to illegally building a chicken coop on our roof her new interest is threatening to get us kicked out.  Neighbors are starting to complain about the noise and smell ( from the chickens) and the landlord has already given her warning about blocking the fire escape.  Every time I try to talk to her in a calm manner about it she gets angry and says she is only trying to get us back in touch with the natural life.  How can I make her see that a city-apartment is not the place to start a farm, before we both lose our home?

Signed,

Forced-farmgirl in the Mission

Dear Farmgirl:

When rationale fails

Time to separate your house

Look for new roommate